2. It feels like I'm trapped.
3. Like I'm in a fish bowl by myself, and I can't get out.
Memuatkan…Memuatkan…
1. I woke up one morning...
2. It happened all of a sudden before summer break.
3. ... And it was like there was something stuck in my right ear.
4. This was different.
5. I've had ringing in my ears¹ plenty of times before, but this...
6. I'm in the pop music club...
7. ... So I'm in the studio a lot and go to live shows all the time. Lots of loud noises.
Memuatkan…Memuatkan…
1. Then I started getting dizzy. The vertigo was so bad, I couldn't even walk properly.
2. I waited and waited, but it didn't go away.
3. ...so I went to get it checked out, and the doctor said...
4. That's when I was like, "Yeah, this is bad"...
5. "This looks like sudden deafness."
1. So that's why she was absent...
2. "...so they could do more tests."
3. "I had to go to the hospital right away..."
4. "It was hell."
5. "When I thought I might have to live like that forever..."
6. "...I was terrified."
7. "The nonstop ringing in my ears, the dizziness..."
1. I just remember praying...
2. ... That I'd wake up, and things would all be back to normal.
3. "Tomita-san?"
4. What I actually got...
5. So much for that.
1. "As things stand, I'm afraid you won't get hearing back in your right ear."
2. "Unfortunately..."
3. "...modern medicine just doesn't have the answers right now."
4. "...was hell and then some."
5. "...but I wasn't in any shape to go to school."
6. "They sent me home..."
1. "Heck, I've only lost hearing in one ear, and I can barely get by!"
2. "Walking was tricky at best..."
3. "...and conversations? Hopeless."
4. "But if I focus in on the sound, I lose track of what the conversation is even about."
5. "It's constant stress, twenty-four-seven."
6. "...and if I pick up something with my left ear, I can't tell where it's coming from or how far away it is."
7. "I don't hear anything on my right side..."
8. ...behind a big sheet of glass.
9. It's like I'm alone...
1. "...just looking out at the rest of the world."
2. "Like I'm some fish in an aquarium..."
3. "..."
4. "Yup."
5. "And all from losing my hearing in one ear."
6. "After that..."
7. "...when things really started to sink in..."
8. —128—
1. So why me?!
2. Aah! I've had perfect hearing my whole life!
3. ...I got so... Angry.
4. Why me...
5. Everyone else can hear just fine!
6. Why me...
7. Why me...
1. "Kanon oikawa!"
2. "She lost hearing in both ears, right?"
1. "Ha ha ha!"
2. "It was me. I was the one..."
3. "I think she could use a little reality check!"
4. "Yeah!"
5. "Why should we have to bend over backwards for her?"
6. "Ugh, that oikawa girl..."
7. "...is such a drag!"
8. "Well, now I do."
9. ...who didn't understand.
10. "But even though it wasn't easy, even though you had to deal with jerks like us..."
11. "...you just tried to be normal."
12. You must have had it even worse than I did.
1. "I..."
2. "I know I don't have any right... ... To ask you to forgive me..."
3. "I'm sorry!"
4. "... But I thought the least I could do..."
5. "... Was say sorry to your face."
1. "Huh?!"
2. "Huh?"
3. "That's what you've been worried about?"
4. "Oh, I did. Even if I couldn't hear what you said, I could tell from your face."
5. "Trust me, I noticed."
6. "Wait... Did you not notice?!"
7. "What do you mean?! I've been awful to you this whole time!"
8. "Do you have a second? Like, right now?!"
9. "D..."
10. "When you stopped me at the hearing aid shop..."
11. "But that's not my point."
12. "I knew it..."
13. "Urgh..."
1. "I get it. You still can't really accept the idea of wearing a hearing aid, right? You told yourself you'd just stop by that shop to talk to them."
2. "...I just thought it'd be something more... Complicated."
3. "Something you didn't think other people would understand."
4. "I know I sure did once!"
5. "...but sometimes it feels even worse when friends and family try to act all sensitive."
6. "Doctors are doctors, so they have to give it to you straight..."
7. "Someone you could tell how you really felt."
8. "I thought maybe you wanted..."
9. "...someone in the same situation."
1. "Anyway, if that's what you want, I'm happy to listen."
2. "..."
3. "..."
4. "You mean it?"
1. "Hah!"
2. "'course! I might not be able to hear it, but..."
3. "Hee hee..."
4. "A... Am I supposed to laugh?"
5. "Is that okay?"
6. "Uh, yeah! It was a joke!"
7. "Saki! Laugh!"
8. "A-huh..."
1. I hope talking to kanon made her feel a little better...
2. "Boy, what a story. I can't believe that happened to her."
3. ...would be so ready to talk things out with her.
4. ...I never thought kanon...
5. But I have to say...
1. Kanon really has...
2. ...changed.
3. "Dang..."
4. "You know..."
5. "...the truth is..."
6. "...I kinda hated you for the longest time."
7. "...talking to you like this... Oikawa-san."
8. "I never thought I'd be sitting here..."
9. "Tell me about it!"
1. "I know, I know! Just lemme finish!"
2. "And you can drop the "-san"!"
3. "Huh? Now you say that?"
4. "..."
5. "So, uh..."
6. "You probably don't remember..."
7. "...but we met before high school."
8. "There was this piano competition."
9. "It was when we were in grade school."
1. "I was up first..."
2. "...and you were right after me."
3. "For some reason, I'd gotten it into my head that you were my rival or something."
4. "My mom was a piano teacher, too..."
5. "...and we were the same age."
6. "Plus, I knew you'd won some big awards."
7. "So I decided I'd beat you no matter what."
1. Yes!
2. That's the best I've ever played!
3. Then it was my turn.
4. I'll win for sure!
1. "Guess you're up next. Good luck."
2. Number forty-two. Kanon oikawa-san.
3. "Wha?!"
1. "Worse, you ended up winning... And you didn't even look happy about it!"
2. "Oh, my god, I was so pissed!"
3. "She totally ignored me!"
4. "..."
5. More and more students started dropping my mom's lessons...
6. ...and switching to your mom's place.
7. Eventually, my mom had to close her school.
9. It's all that girl's fault!
10. ...so I stopped wanting to play.
11. She even quit teaching me piano...
1. "I know- it was petty."
2. "But anyway, to make a long story short..."
3. "...I was-"
4. "Hang on!"
5. "You played mozart, right?"
6. "...I remember that!"
7. "Oh, man, it's all coming back to me now!"
1. How am I supposed to beat that?
2. Yikes! She's really good!
3. "I heard the person before me-"
4. "I mean, I heard you playing, and..."
5. It's just me and the piano...
6. Stay calm. Focus.
7. No, stop!
8. "Sorry about that..."
9. "I probably couldn't even tell what was going on around me."
10. "I was in my own little world!"
1. "Are you freaking-"
1. "I feel like my head's about to explode."
2. "Nothing makes sense anymore!"
3. "No...."
4. "Ugh... It's too much."
5. "Did you even hear what I said?! You're just saying whatever!"
6. "Whaddya mean, no prob?!"
7. "Hey, no prob!"
8. "Oops. You noticed?"
1. "Hey, it's fine. Really."
2. "Sorry... there I go again..."
3. "Ugh..."
4. "See?! That's why I can't stand y-"
5. "...!"
6. "Erk!"
7. "But if you could be..."
8. "...maybe just a tiiiny bit nicer than before..."
9. "...that would be great!"
10. "...over people trying to be polite all the time."
11. "I'll take that any day..."
12. "We're not kids!"
13. "I'm back! Have you two been playing nice?"
14. "Is it that hard?!"
15. "Huh?!"
16. "I'll... try."
1. "There was too much other stuff going on!"
2. "No, wait... You have to stop by my place! We didn't get to talk about the movie!"
3. "Are you gonna stop by my place?"
4. "Sure. I'm free till dinner."
5. "Yeah."
6. "You and tomita-san had a nice, long chat, huh?"
7. "Huh?"
1. "I didn't expect tomita-san to open up to us like that."
2. "I know, right?"
3. "No, I mean..."
4. "I was kinda surprised."
5. "...at myself."
1. "... So I was fine not having anything to do with them."
2. "I never really liked the other girls in class..."
3. "That me from before could never have talked to tomita-san like I did today."
1. "I dunno... You've just got a big..."
2. "What do I have to do with anything?!"
3. "It's thanks to you, saki!"
4. "...a big what?!"
5. "...but you never even look mad. You just accept it and move on."
6. "Lemme write it down!"
7. "Wha? Sorry, didn't catch that..."
8. "Like, I mishear you all the time, I make you repeat stuff over and over..."
9. "A big heart! You're... Generous?"
10. "You've done every rehearsal with me!"
11. "What about choir practice?"
12. "I dunno! Would they?!"
13. "I mean, wouldn't anyone?"
1. Uh-huh!
2. Uh... huh.
3. "Again... wouldn't anyone?"
4. "And anyway, I'm the one who agreed to be the accompanist."
5. "I feel like you're giving up your whole summer."
6. "...But I'm not sure that I would've, if it'd been me in your shoes."
7. "...You might think anyone would do that stuff..."
8. Well...
9. "I keep thinking, 'Maybe I'll learn to be as generous as Saki someday.'"
1. I think it's the thought of that...
2. "Hm?"
3. ... That makes me keep pushing myself.
4. "You're giving me way too much credit..."
5. "I said, you're giving me too much credit!"
6. "Way too much!"
7. "Huh? Sorry, what did you say?"
1. Big-hearted, huh...?
2. "Quit teasing me!"
3. "Hoo hoo! ♡"
4. "See? There you go again, being all big-hearted!"
5. "Ohhh?"
6. "But I'm not that good a person!"
7. "Y'know, that usually means someone who's nice to everybody."
8. "Just to me?"
9. "So..."
10. "...does that mean you're not this nice to anyone else?"
1. "Heck, you might as well come right out and say you're in love with me!"
2. "Oops! There I go teasing you again."
3. "Hey, sa-"
1. "I..."
1. "I just remembered- my mom asked me to stop by the supermarket!"
2. "Hey, wait!"
3. "See you later!"
4. "Huh?!"
5. "I'm sorry! I have to go home!"
Works Consulted
Haga, Yuuko and Karin Matsumori, eds., with manga by Sayo Takeshima. Yuuko to Karin no baria furii komyunikeishon (Yuko's and Karin's Barrier-Free Communication). Shogakukan Inc.
Ounuma, Naoki, ed. Bijuaru bukku - Shougai no aru hito to tomo ni ikiru 2: mimi no fujiyuu na hito wo yoku shiru hon (Visual Book - Living with People with Disabilities 2: Getting to Know People with Hearing Disorders). Editorial Committee for Living with People with Disabilities Books. The Accessible Design Foundation of Japan. Godo Shuppan.
Organization for Psychological Issues of the Hard of Hearing, ed. Nanchousha to chuuto shicchousha no shinrigaku: kikoenikusa wo kakaete ikiru (Psychology of the Late-Deafened and Hard of Hearing: Living with Hearing Loss). Kamogawa Shuppan Inc.
Outani, Kunio. Mimi no kikoenai hito, omoroi yan! to omowazu icchau hon (A Book That Will Leave You Thinking, "Deaf People Are So Interesting!"). Seikosha Inc.
Shirai, Kazuo, Teruo Koami, and Yayoi Satou, eds. Nanchouji/seito rikai handobukku: tsuujou no gakkyuu de oshieru sensei he (Understanding Children and Students with Hearing Loss: A Handbook for Teachers in Regular Education). Gakuensha Inc.
Wakinaka, Kiyoko. Choukaku-shougaisha kyouiku: kore made to kore kara. Komyunikeishon ronsou/kyuuyusai no kabe/shougai ninshiki wo chuushin ni (Education for the Deaf and Hard of Hearing: Past and Present. With a Focus on Communications Theory, the "Age-Nine Barrier," and Disability Awareness). Kitaohji Shobo Inc.
Yamaguchi, Toshikatsu. Chuuto shicchousha to nanchousha no sekai: mikake wa kenjousha, kizukarenai shougaisha (The World of the Late-Deafened and Hard of Hearing: Outward Normalcy, Hidden Disability). Hitotsubashi Shuppan Inc.
See you next volume!
1. Author's Note
2. ¹Also known as noise-induced hearing loss or acoustic trauma. A form of sensory hearing loss caused by prolonged exposure to loud sounds resulting in damage to the hair cells in the cochlea within the inner ear. Treatment may be required if symptoms fail to improve on their own.
3. This is the sound of Hyalessa maculaticollis, a species of cicada known in Japan as min-minzemi in honor of its distinctive cry. In much the same way that floating cherry blossoms are inextricably linked to spring in Japan, the cry of the minminzemi is highly evocative of summer.
5. In Japanese, this store is called Rirakko, presumably a portmanteau of the words rirakkusu (an English loan-word meaning "relax") and rakko, the Japanese word for sea otter. This may be a nod to the beloved mascot Rilakkuma, whose name features a similar play on words using the word for bear, kuma.
7. The Japanese term that Kanon calls to mind here is ryouhanten. These "mass retail stores" operate on the concept of selling a bit of everything.
9. This may be a reference to a fictional manga that appears in another of the author's series, Egao no taenai shokuba desu.