正在阅读 Penny & Aggie

章节 1

1. "Oh, justin timberlake is so last month!" 3. "I listen to his interviews now with that squeaky little-brother voice, and I'm, "Uhhh! When did I ever find you attractive?"" 4. "And what's up with his hair?" 6. "Cameron diaz will be glad to hear you've withdrawn from the race."

1. "So, who's your crush this month? Derek lubowski? I'm sure he'd be honored." 2. "Too embarrassed to say? He must be hot!" 3. "God, she's so stuck up!"

1. "Who's the villain of wuthering heights? Penny?" 3. Ggh! Emily bronte? For... Writing it? No... 4. "The nurse! For not getting them psychological help?" 5. "Aggie?" 6. "Emily bronte, for writing it and torturing her characters with depression." 7. "Creative! Good!" 8. Why does life hate me as much as I hate her?

1. WELL, HERE I AM, DEREK... GETTING A SUMMER JOB, JUST LIKE YOU LIKE! 4. “I think nothing’s sexier than a woman who works when she doesn’t have to.” — Derek Lubowski 7. IT WON'T BE SO BAD, SELLING TO BOOKWORMY-TYPES. I'LL PROBABLY BE THE ONLY GIRL IN THE STO- 9. "YOU?" 10. "JUST MY LUCK. MY HOROSCOPE TRIED TO WARN ME."

1. "How'd you get this job? I didn't know you read anything." 4. "Hmph." 5. "Oh, may I help you, sir?" 6. "I'm... Looking for a book on country music?" 7. "Right this way!" 8. "Wow, do you work out?" 9. Some of us know how to read people.

1. "Wait! Sir, you want music history or how to play music?" 2. "How to play." 3. "Okay... Let's try "How to," then..." 4. "Actually, they're both in the "Music" section." 5. "You'll have to forgive my co-worker. She hasn't been taking her medication."

1. "Can I help someone?" 2. "Do you need help?" 3. "Finding everything all right?" 4. "Help?" 5. "Sale! Come on in! Help keep america literate!" 6. "Big brains are cute! Come with me, I'll make yours bigger!" 9. "Mommy, I'm scared." 10. "I've never had to say this before, but... I'm afraid you're both overqualified."

1. "I love this year's fashion. Love it! I mean, only $125 for this?" 2. "Finally, even poor people can look good!" 3. "Good attitude! Get to work." 4. "Can I help you find anything, mi--" 8. "You!" 9. "Nope. Just found what I wanted."

1. "Look, I know you can't stand to be around me, so just... Go." 3. "That's big of you." 4. "But I'm doing more job interviews since, y'know, you got me fired, so I need a more professional wardrobe." 5. "Oh, look! Your supervisor!" 7. "So you say this yellow goes with this orange?"

1. "I just don't know... I thought my shoe size was 9, but maybe that was 5... Or 11..." 2. "These are all the blue bras you have? What other stores would carry more?" 5. "Where are your three-piece suits for women?" 6. "Penny, that girl just spent $300, so... Be nicer to her next time, okay?"

3. Okay, skank. You want to fight? You want a fair fight? 4. Then I'll sneak up behind you and stab you in the back. 5. Hey, why should I give you anything you want?

1. But how to get her? 2. The last enemy I had was meg. We showed the slumber party pictures to the boy she liked. 5. But aggie doesn't go to parties. She's always off by herself. No one knows who she likes. 6. Ooo... She's good.

1. "Hey, mr. D'amour?" 2. "My name's penny? I'm a friend of aggie's, I work at cloth-mart?" 3. "She forgot her earrings! I'd like to surprise her... Can I hide them in her journal?" 4. "Ohhh, no. Thanks, but aggie's journal is her eyes only." 5. "...can I use your bathroom?" 6. Why can't he be clueless like every other dad? No wonder she's so sneaky.

1. HER DIARY! POOR AGGIE. ALL YOUR EMBARRASSING SECRETS ARE MINE NOW. I ALMOST PITY Y-- 5. IS THIS SOME KIND OF CODE?

1. "Hey, princess. How was your day?" 2. "Daddy, I told you. I don't support the monarchy." 4. "Whatever you say, congresswoman aggie." 5. "Everyone says they have the world's dorkiest dad, but only I live the reality." 7. Why does this kind of thing always happen to me?

1. "Wait a minute..." 2. "What are you doing with those?" 3. "They're just... Old magazines." 4. "They were mom's magazines! I saved them for a reason!" 5. "We'll... Get some staples, we..." 6. "Shut up! I hate you!"

1. AWK-WARRRRRD...

1. Well, I got her. Except... No "Excepts!" next time she annoys me, I'll go... 2. "That would really hurt if my mom weren't right there to build up my self-esteem." 3. But... 4. No "Buts!" no "Althoughs," no "Unlesses!" this is a great victory and I'm happy about it! Okay? Okay? Okay! 5. Okay?